Electronically Brighter

Your electric bill will love you oodles and bunches. Besides, who cares what the neighbors think?

Wow, de wow! wow! wow! wow!

Click to embiggen

Legos: Who knew they had it in them?

My  wife and I went to the Balmoral Show and one of the first exhibits we stopped at was the breeding bulls. We went up to the first pen and there was a sign attached that said,

THIS BULL MATED 50 TIMES LAST YEAR

My wife playfully nudged me in the ribs then smiled and said, ‘He mated 50 times last year.’ We walked to the second pen which had a sign attached that said,

THIS BULL MATED 150 TIMES LAST YEAR.

My wife gave me a healthy jab and said, ‘WOW! That’s more than twice a week! You could learn a lot from him.

We walked to the third pen and it had a sign attached that said, in capital letters,

THIS BULL MATED 365 TIMES LAST YEAR.

My wife was so excited that her elbow nearly broke my ribs, and said, why that’s once a day. You could REALLY learn something from this one.

I looked at her and said, Go over and ask him if it was with the same old cow.

My condition has been upgraded from critical to stable and I should eventually make a full recovery.

Obama has just won the Heisman Trophy. He watched a football game.

The word is out that Obama just won the Stanley Cup.

As Obama was drove to pick up his Nobel Peace Prize, he won the NASCAR Sprint Cup.

Obama threw 984 touchdowns and rushed for 3.8 brazilian yards. In his efforts, the Kenyan Water Buffaloes goes to their first Super Bowl victory.

Obama had been thinking about cutting a CD. He won a Grammy. What a guy!

While we drank our first cup of coffee this morning, Obama won the Tour deFrance.

Look at him go!

In a stunning development, Obama has been named Grand Wizard of the Peckerwood, Mississippi Kleagle Local #79.

When will it stop? What will be next? Does the poor man ever get any sleep?

Did you know that a new world record has been set for the HIGH JUMP  and from a KNEELING position? The record (1.73 metres) was set on a beach near Montpellier in Southern France.

Taken just a split second before the jump, the photo below provides a reasonably clear idea of how this remarkable feat was cleverly attained.

Today I will not complain about my job.  I will not whine nor will I express my personal disdain to my associates, affiliates or to my supervisor regarding my job. Today, I will be thankful for every irritation, distraction, and challenge.

Today I realize that I am one lucky grunt compared to what this fella does in order to earn his paycheck.

No matter what happens at work today, life is good!

Run stop light= $100.00
Nailed for DUI= $350.00
No  seat belt= $150.00
Add favorite photo to fake Driver’s License= PRICELESS

A three year old boy is sitting on the toilet. He had been in there for a lengthy time, his mother thought so she goes in to check on him to see if he’s okay. She found him sitting on the toilet with a book on his lap. Mom determined that he seemed okay except that about every 10 seconds or so, he would put the book down, grip onto the toilet seat with his left hand and then hit himself on top of the head with his right hand.

Stifling her laughter, his mother had to ask, “Billy, are you all right? You’ve been in here for a very long time. Billy looked up at her and said, “I’m fine, Mommy. I just haven’t gone doody yet.” Assured that Billy was indeed okay, his mother said, “OK, honey, you can stay in here a few more minutes, but Billy? Please tell Mommy why you are hitting yourself on the head?”

Billy said, “Works for Ketchup!”

Life doesn’t provide dress rehearsals, most of us know. Yet, look how well this pilot managed to perform after a slight problem with his right wing developed. And for those of you who don’t use Firefox, you can view the same video here.

The kids were bored today during lunch, I think.  See what I found left behind on the table.

The kids did great in Anatomy and Physiology, I see, although I also see that it must be time for school to start again. I’m certainly ready and so are the kids. They need something more challenging to do than just hanging out and doing nothing.